The Secret of Living Well? Let’s Wonder Together …

“Perhaps the secret of living well is not having all the answers, but in pursuing unanswerable questions in good company.”  Rachel Naomi Remen, MD

One of my favorite words is “wonder,” especially the interplay between two of its definitions – to marvel (“wow!”) and to question (“how?”).  When I pay attention to this combination of awe and curiosity, magical “surprises” regularly show up for me.  And when this happens, I predictably find myself wanting to share these experiences with others.

This is particularly true for my clinical work.  The complex workings of the human body and its many manifestations of health and disease overflows with wonder.   When I am present and attentive, there are numerous “wonder-filled” moments during my day.  This is likely true for you as well.  However, in the day-to-day busyness and isolated nature of work, it is easy to put our heads down and just plow through and in the process, not only miss these moments but also the opportunity to share them.  Which has left me pondering how I/we might transcend this pattern. 

Recently, while working with one of our 3rd year medical students, I decided to very intentionally look for opportunities to embrace this sense of wonderment, and to invite him into that space with me.  During one clinical session, we cared for a 100-year old great-great grandmother who shared pictures and stories of her newborn great-great granddaughter, diagnosed hyperthyroidism in a 19-year old with a significantly enlarged thyroid who has likely had it for at least a year, heard the story of a man who had lost 50 pounds in the past 6 months by changing his diet, I&D’d an abscess to profuse thanks, and discussed two instances where cognitive “anchoring bias” had likely led to misdiagnoses.  By the end of our time he was wide-eyed with marveling and questioning.  It was an exhilarating time that left me reflecting just how different that same clinic would have been had we not shared these moments together.   

In her poem "Sometimes", Mary Oliver writes about how to bring more wonder into our days with 7 words of simple yet profound wisdom that she called “Instructions for living a life”:

Pay attention.

Be astonished.

Tell about it.

Each day we have the opportunity to both embrace our amazing professional journey and also to share it with those around us – not only students, but also colleagues, nurses, and even patients.  Too often, however, the nature of our work and the manner in which we carry it out leaves our sense of wonder neglected and dulled.  Over the next 3 weeks, consider setting an intention of sharing one wonder-full thing a day with someone – perhaps starting with your PeerRx partner.  Through pursuing meaningful connection to “marvel and question” together, perhaps the “secret” of living well will no longer be such a secret after all.