To Be Known

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves ....” — Rainer Maria Rilke

‍In last week's blog we explored the simple, powerful act of discovering something new about one another in small moments of curiosity that quietly enhance connection. But what happens when curiosity lingers long enough to become something more? When the questions are not just asked, but held? When the answers are not just heard, but received? For many of us, beneath the surface of our roles and routines lies a deeper longing to be known, not for what we do, but for who we are.

‍And yet, when I ask colleagues, “Who really knows you?”, the answers are often telling: “No one.” “My dog.” “Different people know parts of me.” Sometimes even, “I’m not sure I know myself.” Somewhere along our journey, many of us have learned to offer only curated fragments rather than to be known in a soulful, transparent, and loving way.   

‍Perhaps being known is less about being fully understood and more about being more fully welcomed. Not fixed. Not analyzed. Not even fully explained. In those rare moments, often with a trusted friend, a partner, or a PeerRx colleague, we sense what it is like to invite someone to hold, with us, what we’ve been carrying alone. 

‍This week, consider not just what you might learn about someone else, but what you might allow to be known. Go a layer deeper than usual. Or ask, gently, “What feels important for you to share right now?” Then listen, not to respond, but to receive. And perhaps, in a quieter moment, notice what it is like to sit with yourself in that same way; unrushed, unedited, open. What begins to emerge when nothing is required but presence?

‍The recently completed poem below reflects on what lasts after such a time—when in that shared space something shifts, and we remember that beneath the many roles we carry, there is a deeper truth waiting to be named, and known, together.

‍ ‍‍ ‍

Known

On this seemingly

ordinary rock

‍ ‍in the middle

‍ ‍of the river

‍ ‍‍

where arrival

‍ ‍is only by

‍ ‍intention

‍ ‍‍ ‍

there’s always

‍ ‍room for two.

‍ ‍

Here

‍ ‍let’s share

‍ ‍what matters now

‍ ‍what’s never been said

‍ ‍what can’t be said enough

‍ ‍‍ ‍

speak of love and loss

‍ ‍fear, shame and wonder

‍ ‍‍let’s laugh

cry

sing

shout

dream

‍ ‍‍ ‍

or simply

listen

‍ ‍

and be

known

‍ ‍‍ ‍

as I am

here

today

‍ ‍

by myself

yet not

alone

‍ ‍

this rock

the water

‍ ‍‍ ‍

you have become

part of me

‍ ‍

and I

of you‍‍‍ ‍

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Deciding What Matters

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I Didn’t Know That!